The Heart Contains Infinitely Many Rooms

Just by writing the title of today's blog I'm taking a giant step. A lot of my blogs are stories about my family and the things that have happened to me. This is a story about a state of mind and heart.

I've said and written before that my father died a tragic, early death and that when he died, I died too. I've also written that a Golding cousin put me in touch with a man who grew up with the Golding boys, Irvin and Sherwin (my father) and this particular connection had the ability to soothe and settle the part of me that was in a constant state of pain and grief. The heart has no calendar and you can't apply the word "should" to the soul. My father died in 1968 and I "should" have gotten over it by now. But no; it doesn't work like that. I have healed in the last year due to an almost random series of events. If you believe in God or a Higher Power you could say that it is my Higher Power's will that I should heal now and in terms of time it's not too late or too early.

My father's body is gone but his spirit was hovering. After the connection with my father's and uncle's friend from the past, my father's spirit came to settle in an empty part of my heart. He's there and I often feel his presence, especially when I'm having a problem. He was a scientist, as I've written before, and he believed in logic and the scientific method. When I was a teenager he told me about this way of thinking often enough!! I had no use for my father's ideas then; they sounded so boring and colorless. However, I've learned in the last year that these ideas provide fruitful options in problem-solving. Thanks, Daddy.